Friday, December 3, 2010

Runners Low

You always hear about "runner's high", but not much about "runners low:"  that nagging feeling you get Saturday mornings at 5:30, that won't let you sleep in;  that there is something else you should be doing.

It has been 3 weeks since my last run.

I've always had a little pain in my right leg.  It was mild, then moderate, then a couple weeks ago, I went for a run, and got about 200 m before throwing in the towel and limping home.

I went to the doctor last week.  She told me to stop running.  Probably for good.  I spent the day mourning my immortality, and trying to face the fact that I may be a swimmer-only for the rest of my exercise existence.  From the moment I started running, I knew I wouldn't last forever.  When I was diagnosed with ankylosing spondylitis, I asked the doctor what I should do for exercise to which she replied "well, you won't be running any marathons." I guess I took it as a bit of a challenge. . .   The way I see it - I'm going to be a hunched over old lady anyway, I might as well get that way because I actually did something.  So, I started running.  Surprisingly, I think it actually helped in my case - my increased circulation and muscle tone prevented me from "freezing."  And ok, I got a good deal of pain relief from endorphins (yes, I'm self-medicating.)  So, I have a hard time taking "No" for an answer.  Call me crazy, but I'm not ready to quit yet.

I went to a physiotherapist (that's a "physical therapist," Americans.)  After putting me in the iron maiden, and other methods of torture, he said "no, that's not arthritis - you've probably got a tear on the tendon that attaches your hamstring to your hip process."  Yep.  I blew a hammie.  This is actually good news - it's fixable.  Right now, my choices are 1) surgery, or 2) do lots of physio and then perhaps run slow the rest of my life.  Right now, I just want to be able to walk without limping.

I think I can handle slow.  Maybe.


Kimberly said...

yeeowch-o. Do the surgery. You aren't ready to quit running. I think you are inspiring!

Tami said...

Good luck. I hope it doesn't take too long to heal. I know that awful feeling, when you want to run and your body brakes down and won't let you. Hate that!

The White Wash said...

Oh Juli I am so sorry!! I had to quit running or a good month to heal a small injury and that stunk. Yours beat mine. I hope you get it fixed. You were my inspiration to run farther and I haven't made it to the marathon yet. Get well soon!!!

beck said...

Get it fixed. Would that be your first surgery ever? You shouldn't have to be limited by your body (at least to the extent we can control). Or don't. And be mentally healthy about it, unlike me. :)

beck said...

And I'm really sorry too. It's frustrating not to be able to do something that you want to do. I've been thinking about you.